I’m laying in bed
wishing I could pray
like a good Christian
but I’m tearing my ear drums
apart with music, away from reality
because I’m afraid
I’m scared of anything
and all things
that bang against
the veins of my heart
jolting fear all through me
and I’m scared
because I don’t want it
to wound my soul
once again
I don’t want to be in this pattern
of wanting to be wind in shadows
of the valley of death
I want to live
without the jaws of fear
and the bars of anxiety
but I fear that it’s a life
I’ll never know.